Kickstarting Your Addiction Recovery Journey

by: Adam Cook

Overcoming substance abuse can be difficult. Often, fighting to overcome your addiction can seem like a constant fight. When you add in the responsibility of caring for your family and performing satisfactorily at your job, it can seem almost impossible. But, it is important to know that you are not alone and countless others have walked this path before you.


Many others struggling with substance abuse have come out on the other side sober and have gone on to live successful lives. There is not an untrodden forest in front of you, but a well-cleared path. While the trees might be dark sometimes, there is a way through. By working diligently to recover and considering some of the steps we offer here, you too can recover.

Seek Support

It is hard to make any sort of a journey without the proper support team – substance abuse is no different. According to Live Science, friends and family members are the greatest resources someone recovery from addiction can use. So, use them! They can help you with nearly every tip in this guide, help you find health care professionals and simply give you a comfortable place where you can be yourself and express your setbacks without judgment. Nearly every friend and family member you have wants to help you through this tough time, but they might feel awkward asking what they can do or might just not know that the CAN do something. Reaching out will allow them to help wherever you need them to. If you’re afraid they won’t understand your disease or might need some extra information, you can provide them with a well-researched article to read, such as this one by the National Institute on Drug Abuse.

Start New Habits

While substance abuse is a disease, it is also a habit. Whenever you’re stressed or encounter your triggers, it can simply become a habit to reach for a substance. In fact, using drugs out of habit is commonly considered the first step to addiction. There is a fine line between addiction and habit but getting clean often involves treating both possible aspects. Becoming clean, then, also involves breaking that habit.

Breaking a habit can be done in a number of ways, but the most strategy is to develop a new habit in its place. Building a habit is far easier than completely stopping a habit. So, next time you begin to get stressed and feel temptations, reach for a healthy snack, take a run, or grab a glass of water. And then do it again. And again. Until finally you have developed a new, healthy habit that helps you deal with your stress and triggers. Healthy habits such as diet and exercise can both replace your negative habits and increase your overall health.

Avoid Temptations

On top of developing a new habit, avoiding your temptations all together will reduce the risk that your willpower will break and that you will fall back into old habits. Many recovering addicts have triggers that make them feel the temptation to abuse a substance. According to Psychology Today, a trigger is something that reminds you of the addiction.

It doesn’t necessarily have to be unpleasant and can be something as simple as hearing a song on the radio. But it can lead to an unmistakable urge to relapse. It can be extremely useful to identify these triggers so that you can avoid them. There are around 14 major triggers that commonly cause someone to relapse or begin using drugs. This list is a great place to start when it comes to discovering your triggers.

The road to addiction recovery can seem dark, scary and full of things that go bump in the night. But, it is important to realize and accept that people have recovered before. You can, too. By working closely with a support system, establishing new habits and avoiding temptations, you can set your foot more firmly on the path of addiction recovery.


Photo Credit: Pexels

Recovery and Integration

During recovery counseling, we often encourage clients to separate the bad things they do from themselves. We talk of "the addiction" or "the urge to steal" or whatever it is. And as the client regains balance, "the addiction" loses power and shrinks. And at some point, we encourage integration once again, the recognition that "the addiction" is within them and part of them. Eventually they can use that knowledge to be stronger and to be just exactly who they are.

This poem was written by a client in recovery with 12 steps, who was recently baptized, and who attends church and small groups regularly. This poem is about his "shadow self"--a dark part of himself that has driven the self-destructive behavior in his live for many years. He writes about what the shadow-self wants in order to gain power over if and to be free from it. While it's dark, look at the consequences of knowing this! With knowledge and submission and humility, this client is free from sin and free to follow Christ! 

As you read this dark poem, remember that is is written in first person from the perspective of the thing within that wants to harm. The words of "the shadow" are full of desperate lies, hoping to gain control of what is not rightfully his. This client is free! And he knows the words are untrue! May it be so for all who seek recovery.

Shadow Mission

The thief in the night that stole my life

in an enemy's grip that chokes the light.

Bending the soul, he buried the knife.

The blackness came in a bloody fight.

He said, "Here are the tools. Take what you want

from family and friends. Then you can flaunt

an arrogance that will make them blush,

while they speak of you in a quiet hush.

You don't need them. You just need me.

No need to love touch and see.

How quickly and quietly their hearts will flee.

No need for salvation, a lord and savior.

You can run around in bad behavior.

The illusion of freedom I give to you

until I take everything, even your shoes.

Walk around the world your head stuck in glue.

Reach out for anyone, and no one is there.

The embrace of your loved ones becomes a blank stare.

Your hands always dirty with knots in your hair.

You've given up everything, the ability to care.

A cage in a cage with a side order of chains.

You hold me, your enemy, as I blow out your brains.

No keys can free you, I made you a slave.

Your only serenity becomes an unmarked grave.

You live as a coward, and envy the brave.

Your mine for eternity , unable to save.

Join us at SYM.

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Top Three Things I'd Do

I was asked recently a great question while speaking at All Saints' Episcopal Church while presenting the ministry there to a group of 45 interested people. These were largely not novices at serving homeless people because they have several ministries there that directly serve homeless. The question was "If money weren't an issue, what are the top three things you would do to help your clients."

First, I'm going to give a different answer that I often give to parents of street youth asking what they should do. Here are my top three things that I think a parent should do if they have a street-dependent youth living on the streets of the USA:

A) Get your son or daughter a low end phones with internet. They are regularly on sale for $50 to $80. They may have it stolen from them, so don't buy anything more. Purchase by the month a pre-paid plans ($35 or $40 per month gets unlimited texting, internet and calling). Don't do a contract. Just stick with month by month. Your child can now keep in touch with friends of their choosing. They may even choose to stay in touch with you. They can research places where they can get help and call them. They can stay active on social medias. It's a true lifeline. It's not really a luxury in the USA.

B) Offer to purchase a hotel room about two nights a month to give your child a break. Living in constant crisis with no breaks leads to all sorts of physical, mental and emotional problems. Pay by phone and tell them not to give any type of cash refund for early check-out.

C) When your child decides to get a job and move from the street, help with deposit and living expenses for the first two weeks until they get paid. I would setup a bank account that you can both access and another that only you can access. Put money into the latter and setup a daily automatic transfer for a small amount into the first. Don't' micro-manage but don't provide additional moneys beyond what you agree. They have to learn to make it but deposits and those first two weeks can be giant obstacles.

Now back to the question asked by the audience member. What would SYM do with unlimited funding? We are a faith-based organization. So first, we would make sure Christian volunteers and churches are used throughout the programs described below. We'd be an excellent employer of a volunteer coordinator and a communications coordinator. Together, volunteer and coordinators would:

1) Run a hostel with a kitchen. Active clients who attend indoor events at least three times this month, would get one room night (or something like that) and the option to exchange working at reception, kitchen, garden, or cleaning for additional room nights. All management and supervision jobs would be given to recovering street youth. Day labor jobs would be available in exchange for a room-night. This would be a legitimate hostile and we would welcome paying guests as well.

2) Operate a training center that works with some recognizable names in training to provide computer skills for real life (running a computer base cash register, waitress station, receptionist stations, etc.) and training in customer service. We'd operate a doggie day care offering grooming, walking and boarding services to the local neighborhood using clients who have been trained. They would compete for a set of "management" positions but all graduates of training classes could get overnight security, reception, advertising, crate cleaning, dog walking, and dog washing jobs.​

3) Augment government grants for school. FAFSA and governments grants do a great job for most homeless youth willing to attend community college. We'd only pick up certain outliers: felons, people who refused to register for draft, people who can't satisfy residency, etc. We'd continue to buy college books for all clients who go to school and continue to qualify for government aid.

4) (a bonus) Form a hiring agency "co-op." Clients join by paying a small amount each week (possibly even as low as $0.50). In return they can be selected by the membership as the "candidate." All members work hard to get the "candidate" a job, pooling knowledge, networks, and talking straight to the "candidate" about clothing, hygiene, interview skills, attitude, presentation, habits, etc. The candidate signs a contract with the co-op to direct deposit 10% of paycheck for 3 months back to the co-op. Weekly paid members receive published job resources as well as snacks and access to meetings. The co-op pays other members of the group to watch pets or belongs of candidates.

5) (a double bonus) Form a detox facility for substance abuse. We would be a place willing to take in street youth client (attending at least 3 SYM indoor events in the month) for the purpose of detoxing from drugs or alcohol. They would stay there until a bed can be found in a longer term program. The goal of the detox facility is to always be able to get a spot open within 3 days. This would form a bridge buffer to rehab facilities that typically can only free a bed in 2-3 weeks. Two to three weeks is an eternity for a street-dependent youth.

Join our efforts to support Austin street youth. 

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A Client's Dilemma

SYM at work:

 

We met a new client. It was cold and he was wearing shorts and looking a little bit ashen from the cold. He had pants and a coat in his backpack. He looked healthy and strong. He asked to borrow my phone and I let him, admonishing him (as I do all clients) that it's not for drug calls.

 

He wanted privacy. The phone didn't work right at first and frustrated him. And then his call didn't get answered. But eventually he was on the phone, pacing and the discussion seemed agitated.

 

I served others while he talked on the phone. Eventually I went over when he was done. I simply said, "Tough call?" He said, "Yes. My parents don't get me." I asked, "New to the street?" He said, "Yes. I'm supposed to be in a rehab, but I'm not going back to that place. They are mean. I'll go to another one, but not back to that place. My parents just won't hear me, though." I replied, "The rehab won't work if you don't want to be there, anyway. But keep the lines of communication open with your parents."

 

I considered my next move. He was so agitated that I decided to ask, "Would you like a hug?" It was a risky move with a new 6'4" client. Without hesitation, he said, "Yes" and hugged me. He began to fight back tears from the stress and hurt. I just hugged him back until he was ready.

 

He wiped away the tears and then he began to tell me his story. From college student to drug user to caught addict. Forced rehab. He said, "I want to stay out here. Surely if my parents seem me choose to be homeless rather than rehab, they'll understand." I stopped him, "Do nothing to make them do anything. Do things for yourself. Do things that are right for you and forget trying to manipulate or control them." He asked surprised, "Are you a drug counsellor?" I said, "No, but I've been taught by a lot of street youth like you. And I study a bit."

 

I asked, "Is faith a resource for you?" He said, "Yes. I've been working 12 steps. I'm 60 days sober. I'm a Christian." So I asked if we could pray together. He did the natural thing and said, "Sure. You can pray for me." I held out hands and said, "No. I mean pray together. What are you thankful for?" He began to answer. "Do you have sins you'd like to confess?" He did. "What do you want God to do for you?" He wanted provision. He wanted a job. He wanted his parents and brother to understand him. He wanted reunion.

 

After praying, we made a safety plan. We discussed how there are people right here on this block who would be happy to help him spoil his sobriety record this very night. He said he was strong and could resist. We discussed how he needs to find a computer he can use to communicate with family and brother and friends so he can survive the next few days. He knew a way.

 

Then I asked him to soften a bit. "You know how you're going to get by in the next few days. I want you to be willing to wake up tomorrow and do whatever is right for you. If it's going back to rehab, then swallow your pride and simply go. If it's continuing the fight for a new rehab, then do your research and make your case. If it's getting a job, then contact the people who have a copy of your ID so you can get the audit number and order your ID so you can work. But whatever you do tomorrow, do it for you. Stay focused and get help. And keep your faith strong. It may not look like it, but there are a lot of Christians and even more faithful people out here on the street. Don't be afraid to find someone who can pray with you often."

 

He headed away from the Drag to the place he believed he could be safe for the night. It was typical of many first encounters with youth new to the street. I pray for his safety and ultimate decision. I pray lines of communication remain open. I know he's kidding himself in some ways but I also believe he is strong and resourceful.

 

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Hammering Nails

Prayers please.

 

I was counseling a drug addict. He's a Christian. We've done all that can be done to be sure of that. But he can't stop doing drugs. We're working on why. Usually there is a deep-seated reason people seek drugs (to cover something, to avoid something) but it may be that this friend in Christ uses drugs simply for the high... "it likes a high of seeing God face to face." I know that's not true. The guy who sells me the drugs has a pentagram tattooed on his body. I know its a sin for me but I'm powerless.

 

As we discussed he addiction, I tried to give him some new reasons for wanting to stop. The first was a worldly reason. Every time he puts a needle into his arm, he is also stabbing many people who worked to supply his drugs... the grower who gets very little, the refiner who works people to death, the overlord who kills people, the transporters who let people die to carry the goods, etc. That may have helped.

 

And I explained the gospel one more time. Jesus drank the cup of wrath in the garden of Gethsemane. The client knew the story well. So in the cup was your sins. And every time you put a needle in your arm, the cup gets bigger, and more bitter, and more filthy. Jesus has to drink it. The pain of separation from God for Jesus gets that much worse on the cross every time you do it. Jesus cries out, "Father, father, why have forsaken me" even as you put the needle into your arm. You are hammering the nails into Jesus every time you do that. When is enough?

 

He liked both of these tools. He wanted time to think it over. On our next guidance counseling, we plan to discuss how to use the Holy Spirit as spiritual armor against the addiction. Ultimately, his healing and his recovery are up to God. The client has to be willing to give it all to Jesus and he has to be willing to work on recovery. Praying for him mightily!

 

"To know, love and serve street dependent youth."
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Encouraging Words

Check out these words from a young person struggling. Together, we're helping this person every day! This young person is making progress and wrestling with the concepts of who God is and how to know him. Together we make a difference! Bless you!

"My choice of sobriety was a tough one, and I still feel I want to be high. I have set my personal feelings aside because, despite how I feel, the things I want are different from the things I need. I know in my short time being sober that I have found more enjoyment in the little things than I could ever have enjoyed before--like someone's company or a simple conversation. Not to say it's easy or I don't get stressed, but the things I enjoy now I get to enjoy with my heart and soul. I know when I start my day that I am in control. No one can drive my life but me. I for once in my life have faith in myself. I know I can do this. 

I have been on the streets for eight years now, off and on, and I am only 23 years old. I dropped out of high school because moving around I lost credits. It set me back as well as not being able to get to school some days. Sometimes I was too high to pay attention or just fell asleep. I regret not finishing and now that I am sober I plan on making a solid effort and at least getting my GED.

I am taking my life back from myself. It's even hard for me at the moment to admit all my faults, but I cannot lie to myself anymore. This is not the life I want. I want to be happy and to know what true happiness is even if I have to struggle and fight to get it. I know nothing in life worth having is easy to get. It is not going to be a fast fix or going to happen soon enough for me. But it's going to happen. I believe!!!"

"To know, love and serve street dependent youth."
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Afraid to Come Home

He believes in God. He has read the Bible. He comes to our events from time to time. One day, he came in pain, wanting help. 

 

Tommy is typical of the young men we work with. He's been in foster care off and on from his early teens. He has family but they aren't great for one another. He's done just about everything: drugs, theft, sex, and more.

 

Tommy is addicted to drugs. He has a drug of choice, and God has given him strength to stay away. Like many others in his situation, he has substituted other drugs in its place. He goes for a while without drugs and he has other times when he uses a lot. On the day he came to me, he was ready to give them up for good. He was hurting and frightened. 

 

He told me he wanted God to heal him, to take away his addiction. I told him he needed to confess what he has done, so that Jesus can take it away. He began, but stopped. "I can't. I can't talk to Jesus. I talk with God but I can't talk with Jesus." I asked him why. "I know God is real and understand what God wants. But I've tried to talk with Jesus and I just don't feel him."

 

Tommy listed all his sins to me. And he said, "God is mad at me. He's done all these things to me. And I just want to know why. I just want to understand. Why does it all happen this way?"

 

I explained that God loves him and that Jesus is the way to the Father. I explained that he need only confess his sins to Jesus and that Jesus has already done all the work on the cross to take away his sins and restore Tommy. God has always loved him and always will, but God does expect Tommy to have a relationship with Jesus to be restored.

 

Tommy couldn't do it. I pressed him to find out why. Tommy cried and finally said, "I'm afraid. I don't want punishment. I know He's going to break my legs like a lost sheep so I won't wander off anymore. I don't want him to hurt me." I was shocked but I recognized the truth of the moment: how misled Tommy is.

 

God loves Tommy so much, but Tommy is unable to cry out to Jesus for his help. Tommy remains too prideful, independent, and hurt to hear the Gospel. Jesus will not break his legs, but rather will hoist him on his shoulders and carry him back to the flocks. He will celebrate Tommy's homecoming.

 

We will continue to shamelessly offer the Gospel to Tommy. And we will continue to relentlessly ask Jesus to be near Tommy. The Father loves Tommy so much and will provide great and wonderful things for him when Tommy is ready. All the work is done already by Jesus on the cross. The banquet table, a table set in part by supporters of SYM who give, pray and love street-dependent young people, is ready. Many will be invited, including the poor, sick, and lame. We will go out and find the outcast and invisible among us and continue to invite them in. There is room for all because of Jesus! Will Tommy come? Only time can tell. 

 

"To know, love and serve street dependent youth."
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Arrange a meeting with me: tungle.me/terrycole

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